Monday, January 8, 2007

being sweet just doesn't sell, and i've got better things to do

I learned something about myself today. Well, it's nothing new, some things just kind of fell into place.

When I visit a college, I'm not the one talking to the representitive, trying to get noticed or remembered. In my college interview, I was really uncomfortable bragging about myself, even though I knew that's what I had to do. I don't think I've ever flirted with any guy, and I never really want to. When I have a new teacher, I'm not making conversation, trying to get on a good side.

I hate putting out. I don't mind attention, but I hate actively trying to get noticed. I want my words, my work, my actions to speak for themselves. I want to be noticed for what I am, not what I'm trying to be, or want to be, or wish I was. I'm not quiet, I'm not shy, I'm not underconfident. So what does that make me?

Anyways, as I want to be a filmmaker, and networking basically decides your success or failure, I'm going to need to get over that in some aspects. It's something to work on.

1 comment:

Megan said...

Let's just say that this entry says multitudes about you, Rae. And you know, I could add an entry all my own here, but heck, I'm pretty sure the whole world could read it if they wanted, and I'm not sure I want them to. So in it's place, I'll leave this: You're not the only one. It's a good thing. I love you!