it is the season, turn, turn.

I have mixed feelings about spring. I'm tired of bundling up just to run out and get the paper. I'm tired of salt stains on my jeans, and always having wet socks. I miss driving on clear roads, and just wearing a t-shirt and flip flops out. And spring will be wonderful, when APs are done, and all I have to do is hang out and drive around with my friends. I'm making so many plans for spring, I think it's going to be a lot of fun.

But it feels like that once spring comes, and I start having fun, life is going to move really, really fast. Like winter is coasting up the hill, and then spring and summer is just rocketing back down. For whatever reason, I've built up snow in my head as the barrier between me and change. Because the next time it snows, everything is going to be so different.

I think I'll love it. I think I'll be happy. But there are some things that I really don't want to say goodbye to. Summer will be spent working full-time and buying and packing and organzing and planning. Spring it is as far as my official childhood is concerned. I'm going to go to Niagara Falls, and out for ice cream and bike rides and walks, and playing in the park and lazing in my yard. Going out for ice cream and movies, dancing on the weekends, maybe out to the lake every once in a while. I'll watch movies in my AP classes, and spend study halls reading and writing instead of frantically doing homework. It will be sunny afternoons and sundresses and sunscreen and trampolines.

It will be bittersweet. And while I want spring to come, part of me wants to hold off a little bit. Parts of me don't want things to start moving.